Get it, you zesty zombie!
As I discussed in a recent entry, watching slot machine videos has become therapy for me. I don’t need to watch cat videos (although they are therapeutic) because I have cats. My cat alarm clock bites me on the elbow every morning at least two hours before my actual alarm goes off so cat therapy isn’t all it’s cracked up to be.
Slot machine therapy can work if you find the right guy and I did. sdguy1234 to be specific. He reminds me of a gay friend of mine who calls me an old bag of cellulite. I’m never offended by creative insults and sdguy spews them like a younger, less hairless, gayer Don Rickles.
There is no way for me to describe this guy, i.e. I’m being lazy and still have to clean my toilet before I go to bed, so check out his Christmas themed links below.
If you got through the videos without being so offended you offed yourself, you’re probably ready for this song parody of My Favorite Things, which sdguy suggested he should do. I’ve either saved him the trouble by writing it for him, or pissed him off enough for him to tell me to lick his taint like he did to Brittany Spears while playing her slot machine. (I can’t believe that little twat has a slot machine based on her when Mark Twain doesn’t.)
MY FAVORITE SLOT THINGS
Beer in the morning
And beer at the Rio
Green bastard bonus turned into a trio
Those Oompa Loompas who stretch, jump and sing
These are a few of my favorite slot things
Cute bouncing lemmings are always so lucky
Muttering to security go fuck a ducky
Hating on Brent with a few choice zings
These are a few of my favorite slot things
Little pink bastard hop over for dinner
Otto fly over and pick me a winner
Glinda when zesty tugs at my heart strings
These are a few of my favorite slot things.
A double’s not nothin’ so I say gurlbye
Michonne with her pets is a big fucking high
Vegas in summer, fall, winter and spring
These are a few of my favorite slot things.
When the lights flash
When the bell rings
When a hand pay hits. Oh wow!
I simply remember my favorite slot things
Meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow!
Babble & Bite 